My eightysomething cishet woman therapist told me "I don't think anyone would think you're trans I think they'd just think you're a...you know...like a gay woman."
Feels good, man. I don't think I'm 'passing' quite like that but the whole issue is so thorny as to be impossible to dissect so I just don't bother thinking about it. There be dragons.
She's a real fiesty old lady, which is one of my favorite types of person. I prefer old women as therapists. I don't know what I'll do when I have to have a gen-x-er as a therapist. Much less a millennial. One time I had a therapist younger than me and it was the worst experience. She clearly thought I was very ~cool~, which was terrible because I was having really horrible PTSD shit and it was not compatible with talking to someone who thought my life was cool. I did not feel like my life was cool at that point. Old women are amazing and there aren't enough of them in my life. I think on some level I'm probably going around looking for a replacement mother. My real mom's probably approaching 80 at this point. The best part about going to shul was getting fawned over by all the old Jewish women. But shul is like 45 minutes away now.
Speaking of being a 'gay woman,' guess who changed her car's front brake pads? OH YEAH ITS ME, BABY. From now on anytime anything goes wrong with my car I'm going to watch a youtube video of someone fixing it and figure out if I can do it myself. I legitimately saved around $700, and that's including buying some parts and tools I didn't end up using.
So what does that mean? It means I have a car that's in good shape which means I'm going birding Saturday with the South Sound Bird Alliance!! My first time birding with an actual birding group! With people who are Very Experienced!!! I'm so excited and nervous? I want to learn all of the things~~~
Love u all,
Sara